Engagement Story

The sweetest story of the faithfulness of my Jesus.

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Ever since Ian and I started dating, I had always imagined this moment of “sharing the story”. The story of how we met, the story of how we fell in love, and all the little healing, redeeming, freeing, eye opening, peaceful, joy-filled moments in between.

There are so many things about Ian and our relationship that I can’t wait to write about. Our relationship has become the easiest thing for me to talk about, because it is one of the greatest ways I’ve seen God’s faithfulness in my life. I’m SO excited to write about all the things in the last few years, but today I’m going to narrow it down to the story of our engagement day!

Okay, so flashback to May, I had told my bestie girl how I knew Ian was going to propose when I graduated college, because we had a long, pouring out of the heart, conversation one evening about it. We had previously had the conversation many times, solely to be on the same page, and this time the conversation shifted from all the usual questions about marriage, to a matter of when and a time-frame. Naturally, I anticipated the date. We talked about it so much, and from conversations, I was thinking it was coming sooner. So you can imagine, my headspace, when August came and still no ring. I am naturally an impatient person, but you know how God is, God will oftentimes situate you with people that actually rub against you to help mature that part of you that needs developing. Likewise, Ian wants to pray about it, think about it, fast on it, ask for wise counsel regarding it. So obviously He took his time, and looking back I am so glad he did. About two weeks before the day, in prayer time, I just felt God put it on my spirit, that everything happens in his perfect timing. (insert Ecclesiastes 3 verse rn) That this season is one I needed to enjoy. I was going back for Senior year of college, and this was my last year of having as few adult responsibilities as I did. I knew me and Ian were getting engaged, I was fully confident in it. And although I’m excited to marry him as soon as possible, I would wait for forever if I needed to. I walked away from that prayer time, confident in the Lord, and His timing for my life.

Fast forward to August 6th, I woke up at my bestie's house, because I had slept over with her that night. The reason for that, I was moving back to Oxford two weeks from then, and wanted to hang newer, better, pictures of me and Ian up in my apartment. She was going to take our pictures that day, so it was just easier to get ready there with her, cause she was sure to jump in some pictures with me. Because of my prayer time those weeks ago, and the previous conversations with Ian, I was convinced it would be Christmas or Summer before he was able to propose. So naturally, I did not put anything together, which was a God thing for sure, because I am usually so put together and can figure things out pretty swiftly. We got ready and stopped by to meet my mom because I had forgotten my earrings at the house. To my knowledge, she was headed somewhere with a few of her lady friends, so another reason, I knew this wasn't the time. I had stressed to Ian, how I wanted my immediate friends and close family to be waiting after I got engaged to celebrate. Because we were taking pictures an hour away from home, in my mind, engagement never came into question because we would be so far away from everyone. We then left from meeting my mom and went to Ian’s.

To my surprise, (and dismay, bc yes I was salty) he was still in the back getting ready. With my bestie being with me and knowing the whole plan, she even was acting stressed out that he was taking so long and the lighting would be bad.

After taking his precious time, and reshaving his face TWICE, we were finally headed out. He then tells me his dad called and accidentally left the windows at their new house (that they were in the process of building) open, and wanted him to let them down. So naturally, I was getting impatient, and even my best friend acted so stressed out that we were having to do that, completely shooting down any small thought that he could be unknowingly proposing.

At that point, we pulled up to the house, and went upstairs to close the windows, to which Ian said to “close my eyes” because “they painted and it looks so good.”

Again, I thought he was just being extra and trying to be all sweet in front of my friend (ha, like I said a GOD THING because how was I so clueless). I put my hands over my eyes, and walked into the room, as I said aloud, “I don’t smell any paint”, laughing he then said “Okay, Open” and a big balloon statement stood in front of me saying “MARRY ME”. I turned around to him, on one knee, as he said a few sweet things, that ended with “Will you marry me?”.

This realization of what just happened, made me cryyyyy!!! And I’m not talking about a little cry…. I BURST into tears!!! I felt like joy was bubbling from the very bottom of my stomach. The realization of a dream fulfilled and lifelong prayer was becoming something tangible and I couldn’t contain what I was feeling.

1 John 4:18 says, “Perfect love casts out fear.”

From the first day that I met Ian, he has loved me with a love that has taken away all my fear. He has made me feel safe and completely secure. Daily he has reminded me of who I am, and never made me feel like I need to be anything that I am not.

I used to think that the love I felt from God would be a different love than what I could receive from another person, but Ian has shown me that God IS love and there is no love outside of Him.

*God detail* A couple of weeks before me and Ian got back together after our several months apart, I was driving down the road and I remember saying to God that I basically didn’t feel like we had room in our relationship for anyone else( as in me and God). I was so thankful and so content with where I was at in life. I had found such peace and joy in my relationship with Jesus. As I was driving, I remember feeling God so sweetly just say that I didn’t need to worry about being divided, because the love that my husband would love me with one day, would be the SAME love that He loved me with.

This is why I believe I had SO much peace with Ian. The love that I receive from Ian every day, is the same love that I have known from the time I accepted Jesus. Love is love through and through, never changing, always the same. Love is consistent with Who love has always been. This is why Ian has always felt like home. I have never felt divided, but just LOVED even more.

Later that evening when we were alone, and soaking up what happened, He told me “My thought was to commit to a field of work, not a person… And God brought me to you. He carried me in all my flaws and failures. Even this is a clearer picture of His love… all those days ago, I made a commitment to you, now I can’t wait to make that commitment to my wife.”

Like I think most young girls or women do, I had dreamed of this day all my life… who it would be, when it would be, and how it would be.

To be honest, I even imagined it being a little scary! But from one girl to another, or maybe one girl to another boy, let me tell you… this day was MORE and better than I could have ever dreamed or imagined and the furthest thing from scary. Saying “yes” to Ian was one of the easiest decisions I had ever made, because I was confident I had let go of control of my life 4 years ago and fully put my trust in what Jesus has for me.

I could have never imagined a man as amazing as Ian or the peace that far surpassed my understanding when I said “yes”. I’ve never been more at peace and excited for the future in my entire life. Although there are still many things that are unknown of the future, my soul is at rest in the arms of my savior. I’ve put my life fully in His hands and He continues to blow me away.

There was a time when this story seemed too good to be true. I wanted to believe that THIS was what God had for me, but nothing in my life looked like this was possible. My heart had been broken, my mind in shambles, and I couldn’t even recognize who I was anymore. BUT God. But, His goodness. But, His faithfulness. It is beyond what you can imagine and it’s often beyond what you pray.

Ephesians 3:20 says, “Never doubt God’s mighty power to work in you and accomplish all this. He will achieve infinitely more than your greatest request, your most unbelievable dream, and exceed your wildest imagination! He will outdo them all, for his miraculous power constantly energizes you.”

Friend, let me tell you and please believe me… God knows what you want and what you need better than you do. He has your very very best in mind. His heart is ALWAYS for you.

Trust Him. Let go… and trust Him.

He is faithful to bring your heart’s desire in His perfect timing. You will not be disappointed.